If you are asked to list traits of your favorite person, the ones that make him or her special do you find it easy or difficult to do? It is easy to explain why we like someone, but it is easy to state your own characteristics? It stands to reason that this would be an easy exercise. By the time we reach adulthood, most of us have a fairly accurate picture of our personalities.
We know if we are smart, dumb, flighty, silly, or ambitious. These images that we hold of ourselves are important and can exert major influence on what we do with our lives. The big question is where did this idea of our characteristics come from? How does one form a self-concept?
Traits and Characteristics
To understand our own traits and characteristics might seem like an easy task, but how is it done? The most appealing solution is to look inward. We should have access to our own thoughts and feelings. But as it turns out, it is really very difficult to know ourselves in this manner. A good example to explain this is to answer the following question, are you engaging or boring? Is this something you can answer without interaction of others? Of course not! We need the input of others through direct experience to know how we seem to others. It is easy to assume that if others are constantly seeking our company that we are charming. Of course if they cross the street to avoid us then the opposite would be true. So in actuality, contrary to what our common sense tells us, we cannot really look inward to form an accurate self-concept. We must, instead, base our self-image on information provided by others we come into contact with.
Self-concept comes from four sources:
• Our social interactions with others
• Comparing ourselves with others
• Their comments or statements about us
• Careful observations of our feelings , thoughts, and behavior
Self-concept goes a long way towards building self-esteem. Self-esteem is the extent to which individuals perceive their traits and characteristics in a positive or negative manner. Some studies indicate that men and women differ in their levels of self-esteem. This may be in part because men and women experience different patterns of social interactions from the moment of birth.
Because the largest majority of our self-concept comes from the way we interact with others it is possible that these gender distinctions make a difference in the development of how we think of ourselves. Women are more likely to be groomed to think in a collectivist self-concept one in which relations with others are especially important to one’s definition of self, whereas men are thought to develop an individualistic self-concept which is a representation of the self as distinct from others. This is just one theory and is still being debated.
Negative Self-Image
Two people can have similar personalities and react the same but a difference in self-esteem can change the way they interact not only with people socially but also in the work force.
People with high self-esteems often do much better in circumstances than people with low self-esteem. A negative self-concept can be costly to individuals who are trying to improve their lives. This negative image can interfere with not only job satisfaction but also motivation, performance and finding a good position. Fortunately low self-esteem can be changes. Sometimes by something as simple as teaching people how to change how they attribute their outcomes. People with low self-esteem often attribute successes to external events such as good luck or an easy task, they also attribute failures to internal ones, i.e. I am not good enough.
By teaching the same people with low self-esteem to view their success as coming from internal ones and their failures from external ones, self –esteem will be greatly improved. Everybody has a self –concept, an inner picture of our won traits and personality. This concept is mainly formed by our interactions with others and the information they provide to us. Self concept is usually different between men and women and often starts as early as birth. A positive self- concept and self-image is important for success not only in social situations but in the work place as well.
References:
Tharenou, P. Employee Self-Esteem. Journal of Vocational Behavior, 15, 316-346. 1979
Brockner, J. The Psychology of Sex Differences. Stanford Press. California. 1993
Brenda Gargus - Brenda Gargus has a Masters' degree in Psychology and an undergraduate degree in Education. She has taught for 29 years in a variety of ...
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